Geez, what are you doing watching TV on Thanksgiving? Other than watching football in the background, there’s no reason why you should be doing anything other than stuffing your face with food. But if not, here are your best bets:
BBC America is running a James Bond marathon from 8 a.m. until the wee hours of Friday morning: old classics “Thunderball,” “Dr. No,” “”Goldfinger,” then the lame “GoldenEye” and “The World Is Not Enough,” followed the awesome new classic “casino Royale.” Then it’s the awful “Never Say Never Again,” and concludes with the underrated “Man with the Golden Gun.”
Check out “Punkin Chunkin 2010” (5 p.m., Science Channel; 8 p.m., Discovery), which goes behind the scenes at the annual pumpkin-tossing contest. Oh, did I mention they’re tossed with cannons and GIANT CATAPULTS? Awe-some.
Discovery also has a “MythBusters” marathon running from 9 a.m. to 8 p.m. That’s always fun.
Need a conversation starter with your cousins? Check out HGTV’s “House Hunters” marathon in the morning (8 a.m.-1 p.m.) followed by a “House Hunters International” marathon (1 p.m.-8 p.m.). The discuss the socio-economic meaning to Americans’ overwhelming desire for stainless steel appliances, granite countertops and huge closets.
And if you need explosions, USA’s running 12 hours of “Burn Notice” (starting at 6 a.m.)
Games of the day
Patriots vs. Lions (9:30 a.m., CBS). It’s time for the Lions’ annual Thanksgiving beatdown. At least they’ll be home in time for dinner.
Saints vs. Cowboys (1:30 p.m., Fox). Rooting against the Cowboys is as much of a Thanksgiving tradition as turkey. Jason Garrett isn’t as fun to kick around as the hapless Wade Phillips, but he’ll do in a pinch.
Bengals vs. Jets (5 p.m., NFL Network). Here’s where you find out if your relatives have sprung for digital cable or not, or a special package of sports channels. I fear too few have, leaving you to watch basketball.
Sharks vs. Blackhawks (noon, CSN-CA). Only if you’re Canadian and celebrated Thanksgiving back in October.
Wizards vs. Hawks (5 p.m., TNT). A wholly uninspiring NBA matchup, followed by the even worse Kings vs. Clippers (7:30 p.m., TNT). Geez, what happened to showcasing your best teams on holidays? These games seem like more of a punishment.
Temple vs. Cal (6 p.m., ESPN2). Interesting college hoops matchup as the Pac-10 defending champs take on a high-quality early season opponent.
Texas A&M vs. Texas (5 p.m., ESPN). A football game that’s big in Texas, but who else really cares?