Watch it

“Wipeout” (8 p.m., ABC). It’s a World Cup-themed show, and contestants try to avoid getting splatted by giant soccer balls in one obstacle.

“Deadliest Catch” (9 p.m., Discovery). Phil Harris gets flown to Anchorage after suffering a stroke, while over on the Time Bandit the Hillstrand brothers start training a new captain.

“Rescue Me” (10 p.m., FX). Season premiere. Tommy somehow survives the shooting from last season’s cliffhanger, and ends up even more haunted, if that’s possible. I like this show, but wow, it can be the bleakest thing on TV at times.

“Louie” (11 and 11:30 p.m., FX). Series premiere. A new sitcom from comedian Louis CK, about a down-on-his-luck, newly divorced standup comic raising his two daughters in New York. It looks seriously self-depricating, seriously raunchy and seriously funny.

Record it

“Chopped” (10 p.m., Food Network). Among the ingredients: mint liqueur and canned fish. Gag.

“Memphis Beat” (10 p.m., TNT). I missed it last week, but it’s gotten decent reviews. Tonight Juliette Lewis guest stars and Dwight tries to track down a missing trucker.

Catch a score

College World Series (4:30 p.m., ESPN). South Carolina can clinch it win a win tonight over UCLA.

Giants vs. Dodgers (7 p.m., NBC-11). For once, a series other than “Friday Night Lights” gets messed with.

World Cup

Paraguay vs. Japan (7 a.m., ESPN). Meh.

Portugal vs. Spain (11:30 a.m., ESPN). Iberian Peninsula bragging rights are at stake with two of the most exciting teams in the tournament. This is a finals-worthy matchup. I’m picking Spain, because Portugal’s Cristiano Ronaldo annoys me.

Skip it

“10 Ways to Kill Bin Laden” (8 p.m., History). Um, is one of them to send a whack-job from Colorado to do the deed with a sword?

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