Warning, nothing but spoilers ahead. Don’t even read the next sentence if you haven’t seen last night’s finale.
Ugh, what an unsatisfying end to Season 16 of “The Amazing Race.” I’m glad anyone but Brent & Caite won, but Dan & Jordan aren’t a whole lot better. A few quick thoughts:
— Dan & Jordan had been pretty mehh all season, until they turned into total DBs these last two legs. Between Dan going psycho in the Shanghai cab and Jordan pulling a total a-hole line-cutting move at the airport, they burned up any goodwill I had for them. The line-cutting, by the way, may not have been against the rules, and it may not have decided the race, but it was a totally douchey thing to do. Which kinda makes it worse because it was so unnecessary. Boo.
— How was it possible for Dan & Jordan to upgrade to first class? I thought it’s always been a rule that you have to fly coach; I’ve even seen teams have to refuse business-class seats. I don’t get that. And the lead they got because if that pretty much won them the race.
UPDATE: Apparently the rule is you have to buy a coach seat. But if you can finagle your way into a free upgrade, that’s technically not against the rules. (But really, how often are there four first- or business-class seats open on a flight like that? They got amazingly lucky.) So brilliant strategic move or sketchy? I’m leaning sketchy, since it was against the spirit of the rules. When in doubt, ask WWJCD? (What Would Jet & Cord Do? I think we know the answer to that.)
— Wow, that first clue in the Presidio was like a mile from my house. So close, and I never even knew they were here. Overall, good locations for the tasks, forcing them to crisscross the city over and over. It was a much better use of San Francisco than the last time they were here (for the all-stars finale).
— But overall, it didn’t seem like a particularly challenging leg. The positions didn’t change once they left the airport and there wasn’t a whole lot of drama. The Coit Tower climb was good, but everything else seemed pretty easy. (And poorly planned, if the avatar challenge really ended in the exact same spot for two teams’ paths.) The final memory task seemed ridiculously easy, especially compared to past years. For a final leg, I’d have liked to see it tougher, make ’em really earn that million dollars. On the bright side, it was nice that the clues were somewhat cryptic, and didn’t just say “go to Lucasfilm” or whatever.
— Speaking of the exact same spot issue, I wonder if there’s a rule against pushing competitors, and that’s why Jet couldn’t move until Jordan moved first. If not, then he missed a golden opportunity to throw an elbow. Maybe a little hip-check.
— Brent & Caite solidified their place as one of the most unpleasant teams in “Amazing Race” history. I’m so glad I don’t have to see them every Sunday anymore. Though my favorite team didn’t win, it was immensely satisfying to watch them lose. I have literally nothing good to say about them. Next!
— Jet & Cord? Class acts. And in my top echelon of favorite racers ever, with Kris & Jon, Danny & Oswald and Dustin & Kandice. Coincidentally(?), none of them won either. I hope to see the cowboys again in some sort of all-stars race.
— Weird that they called it “Tonga” instead of “The Tonga Room.” ‘Cause, um, Tonga is an island way far away.
— Is “bro” the new “baby”? Make it stop!
— Ugh, why did Phil let Brandy talk? She’s just as classless as Caite. Just shut up and enjoy your 15 minutes of fame. It was kinda hilarious how Carol was cracking up though, whether it was from embarrassment or just shock at Brandy’s gall. (To the surprise of no one, Carol and Brandy are reportedly no longer a couple.)
— In the end, I’d put Dan & Jordan among the top four least-deserving winners of all-time, along with Freddy & Kendra, Flo & Zack and Eric & Danielle (worst winners ever). Dan & Jordan’s final tally of two first-places and one second isn’t too impressive, and they finished fifth-place or worse six times. In their defense, Dan & Jordan were nowhere near as assey as either of those teams (Zack excluded, he was a pretty much a saint for putting up with Flo). But they’re pretty underwhelming winners.
So what’d you think? Did you like the challenges? Was anyone actually not rooting for Jet & Cord? What was your favorite Brent & Caite dumbass moment? Where does this season rank on the awesome meter? (On a scale of 1-10, 1 being Family Edition – NO! That never happened! Never! Happened! – errr, Eric & Danielle’s season, 10 being Chip & Kim’s season, I’d give it a 4. Maybe a 5.)