“Human Target” (8 p.m., Fox). It’s season-finale time already. Tonight, Chance’s old boss – Armand Assante – tries to lure him back.
“Modern Family” (9 p.m., ABC). Jay and Phil compete against each other to be the new basketball coach for their kids’ team.
“Cougar Town” (9:30 p.m., ABC). Sara (Sheryl Crow) gets jealous of Jules. And Andy worries about his son. Wait, since when do they have a kid?
“South Park” (10 p.m., Comedy Central). It’s the 200th episode. Wow. Pretty much every celebrity they ever insulted – including Tom Cruise, Mel Gibson and Mecha-Striesand – team up for revenge and file a class-action lawsuit. Should be a good one.
“Three Sheets” (8 and 8:30 p.m., Travel). New episodes are back. Think of it as a lower-quality “No Reservations,” revolving around booze rather than food. The first episode is in Hawaii, which sounds lame and touristy, but the second is in Tuscany, which could be cool.
“MythBusters” (9 p.m., Discovery). A bottle-bashing bar fight myth is put to the test. Cool.
“Ugly Betty” (10 p.m., ABC). It’s the series finale.
“Top Chef Masters” (10 p.m., Bravo). Last week’s season premiere was pretty underwhelming. Tonight features another six chefs I’ve never heard of. Meh.
Sharks vs. Avalanche (7:30 p.m., CSN-CA). The playoffs are here, so you can start paying attention to hockey now. True story: Last week I remembered I was in a fantasy hockey league and checked in for the first time in two months. Turns out I was in the championships. I love hockey. (A sad epilogue: The championship ended in a 5-5 tie, and I lost the tiebreaker. Guess that shows me.)
“American Idol” (9 p.m., Fox). Another boring results show. Save yourself an hour and find the results online.